Featured on Thought Catalog. Photo courtesy of NeONBRAND.
How far the hold you have on me goes Your image in my brain a permanent imprint My sensibilities are eclipsed- my capacity for rational thought evaporated Your lips like peach kisses, curl into a grin that kills Juice runs down my chin I catch the drops with my tongue
My head spins and I fall dizzy dizzy to the ground at your feet I am consumed by you, a supernova, a star, with light so bright I can’t see past your rays I don’t want to see past your rays
Your absence leaves darkness Leaves me heartbroken and disoriented I’m not sure my eyes will be able to adjust
I think I fell in love with your hands first
They are kind, did you know?
Gentle, caring, slim
Handsome
With fingers long, that drum against the steering wheel
The only song I want to hear
They rest on your lap and I can only imagine what they’re capable of
You’re hands are X-rated, in need of a warning sign
I run with possibilities when they are in my line of sight, the only exercise I crave
Well, not the only exercise
They are warm, like you
Golden light glows from your nail beds, seep into the pads of your fingertips that leave balmy tracks on my thighs I squirm under your touch
Those hands Damn those hands I knew when I saw them, I was in trouble
You shouldn’t be allowed to make me feel like this I think of you and my thoughts run Together they jump and hurdle tumble and fall With broken bones and sprained ankles Busted knees and scraped shin bones They fall into chaos in a matter of moments
I think of you and my heart races
I think of you and I want you with me
I think of you and I feel a longing so deep
That tears build at the base of my eyelashes, thick drops that consume my vision - I cannot function When you infect me with your memory
.........
Maybe it’s for the best that you are far
Maybe it’s for the best that we are not together
Because I couldn’t operate at a normal rate with you by my side
With you near, I cannot think of anything else
This, from the girl who can get distracted by a bumble bees buzz- as though she’s never been outside before
You’d think I’ve never liked anyone before, with the way you make me feel
Because this? This is all consuming
A mix of pleasure and pain so deliciously distressing that I suck greedily at the fountain that spills this black liquid
Fiery shots of cinnamon mixed with brown sugar
That leave ashes piled at the base of my throat
And spill into the hollow of my lungs
Maybe that’s why I’ve had trouble breathing
There’s a pressure in my chest I need to release this breath I count one, two, three I gasp, weak Come on baby, let it out Tears of frustration pin prick my eyes I give in to defeat so quickly This air is pushing against my heart I claw at my chest in the night Jagged scratches that leave raw red records across my rib cage You kiss the scars in the morning